haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
