Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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