please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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