Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize