You made me cry and you don't even care
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
