The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
