What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize