He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Can you repeat that, but with context?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
