found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize