i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize
