You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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