Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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