But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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