the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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