the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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