You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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