Swine flu. Run for my life!
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize