we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
