i was rollin on her like bob the builder
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
