Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
All the doctor said was why
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
