chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
