and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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