her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
