I accidentally burped into my bong.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize