So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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