I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
