Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
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