I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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