i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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