I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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