You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
