hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
either way he was missing a nipple.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Randomize
