Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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