I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
