just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize