What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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