So drunk, too bad you don't want this
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
