I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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