every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
