your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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