Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
