Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize
