its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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