I wanna bring you to show and tell
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize