I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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