I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
