Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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