In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
