Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
she told me i tasted like america
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
