You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
This baby is an asshole
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
